Who loves Groupon like I love Groupon??? It is legit the best way to try a bunch of new things that you probably wanted to do or would never do without spending all your money. It has also introduced me to fun things that I didn’t even know I loved until I tried it. Case and point….Escape the Room.
Before I proceed, I feel like I have a God given talent for investigating and my woman’s intuition is way strong (when I actually listen it’s almost always 100% correct), in my 20’s I used it to be detective and investigate my ex’s shenanigans, ya’ll know what I’m talking about. Then I realized I may or may not have missed my calling to be an FBI Behavioral Analysis Agent. Which leads me to my obsession with Investigation Discovery TV, 20/20, Dateline, Criminal Minds, Sword & Scale & Serial podcast type things. While most people like to listen to the soothings sounds of the ocean to put them to sleep I usually fall asleep to the soothing sound of crime tv. Are you seriously judging?! Everybody has their something.
Anyways, what does Groupon and Crime TV have to do with each other? Well, there’s this new (I actually don’t know how new it is, but before 2016 I’d never heard of it) thing called escaping the room, you basically get locked in a room and have to look for clues, solve puzzles and hone in on your detective skills to get the f*ck out of the room. There are many different room themes to choose from. Although Escaping the Room sounded intriguing to my sisters and I, as avid ID TV watchers we were leary and so we tried the least threatening sounding of the room options. Detective Story…how fitting! So we embarked on the detective story, leary as heck not knowing what to expect but willing to give it a try. Can I just say we had so much fricking fun!! Also, too I have to mention that you generally get an hour to escape the room, we showed up about 20 minutes late, leaving us 40 minutes and we still made it! We showed up and showed out!! I literally haven’t had that much adult fun in I can’t even tell you when.
So much fun that we decided we wanted to try the room that we were all giving the side eye to when were contemplating the first one. This was a serial killer one. I’m glad we tried this room the second go round because if it were the first, someone who have gotten hurt (and I don’t mean my sisters and I). There was a little screaming, scream hugging (you know when you don’t know what else to do while screaming so you hug someone) and some top flight secret stuff. This room was way harder than the first and we had a couple minutes of self doubt and I began questioning my detective skills. Had all those many hours of Investigation Discoverying been in vain! But then after some proverbial bitching slapping and snap out of its and calling in for a couple clues AHEM, WE ESCAPED THE DAMN ROOM!!!!!! We came in, f*cked some shit up, escaped the room and left. Yeah we’re bad ass like that!
I can’t speak for them (but I kinda can) when I say we are now hooked and want to try ALL the damn rooms. Thanks Groupon! Have you Grouponed yet? If so, what fun/not so fun things have you tried?
My black hair was boring, I wanted to lighten things up so I dyed it and it all fell out: Thought I wanted change. Now I want things back to the way they were.
I didn’t speak to her much in the mornings because I’m not a morning person: Thought I wanted some peace and quiet. Now she’s gone and I can’t hear her voice. I have quiet but no peace.
He took for granted the times I washed, folded and put away his laundry: Thought my little gestures of love were no big deal. Now he’s always late because he can’t find his clothes.
She thought cleaning her home was a burden: Now she doesn’t know how much longer she will have this home. She now prays this time cleaning her home won’t be the last.
Like Joni said “don’t it always seem to go, that you don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone”.
Be thankful for your right here and right now. Maybe it could be better but it damn sure could be worse.
So Cakes is 4 now and I have far exceeded the limit on the amount of time allotted to use “I just had a baby” as my excuse for carrying these extra pounds, shit I’ve even gotten extensions on the excuse. My problem isn’t being lazy and not going to the gym it’s that me and consistency just don’t get along. Me and consistency at the gym are like Jets vs Sharks, Bloods vs Crips, Democrats vs Republicans we ain’t friends, we ain’t nothing. Also too I’m an instant gratification kinda gal so if I don’t see a six pack within 2 weeks I’m ready to throw in the towel. “Fuck this shit” is my usual phrase of choice when I’m just done. And then don’t get me started on my gym hair. I’m not complaining about my gym hair in the vain way that you think, it’s more so I sweat like a pig in a sweatsuit under 5 blanket, mostly FROM MY HEAD! Arghhhhh! So the time it takes to untangle and dry my hair is unreal not to mention the days I just don’t feel like addressing my hair and it stays wet for days. It’s just frustrating.
I was living in my oblivious rotund bliss until as innocently and as honest as children can be Cakes started fat shaming me. Yes I’m saying fat shaming because it’s dramatic and sounds really profound right? Of course I know there is no malice behind it, it’s just one of those from the mouths of babes kind of honesty.
So a couple of weeks ago while getting dressed for school I walked past Cakes room and overheard her talking to Mr. Grumps saying look I have a belly like mommy. When I peeked in she was poking her lil flat 4 pack belly out as far as she could. Am I’m pregnant? Nope so you know what that means. Then just last week as we are leaving the house she randomly comes to me and points at my stomach and stays “baby coming”. Let’s just say Mr. Grumps had to hold me back because I will fight a kid! Even my own! Anybody can get these hands! They don’t discriminate! I’m not THAT mature!
So I went and purchased a Fitbit (which I am now totally obsessed with. AGAIN) and decided to just do it! Pun totally intended. I try to remind myself everyday when I wanna quit that it isn’t a sprint it’s a marathon and getting out to do anything is better than doing nothing and complaining. So now because I’m obsessed with getting my steps on my Fitbit (how many people do you hear say that these days lol) I find myself getting up from my desk more often to run up and down a couple steps. Taking long walks at lunch instead of ordering in. And more importantly making time to get to the gym when I tell myself I am. And I’ve noticed this past week that in addition to patting myself on the back for getting it done. I’m also releasing some stress and anxiety that I carry around from day to day that makes me wanna rip people’s head’s off and kick it down the street….I’ll work on my anger management next after I lose weight, one thing at a time people. 😂. I realize now that it all goes back to taking care and making time for myself because I’m no good to anyone else if I can’t be good to me first.
So here’s to making a truce with my arch nemesis gym consistency and putting a stop to the fat shaming and to taking better care. I would love some friends on the journey so if you’ve been feeling like me and want to get started let’s do this thang! Getting out there and moving is like 1/3, accountability is 1/3 and having support makes it a whole pie. Mmmmm pie (just kidding).
Have you started your journey? What helps you stay focused and consistent? What’s on your workout playlist? What helps you get in the zone? I’ve got questions!
Last week my 2 sisters and I went out afterwork in the city. I’m not quite sure how but we ended up on the infamous 5th avenue. Dead smack in the middle of the block is this huge pool standing upright, well actually it’s called “Van Gogh’s Ear” by artists Elmgreen & Dragset It was so cool I had to share with you. Check it out:
I love how these people are casually having a convo as if this big ass pool isn’t dead smack behind them!
Also walking passed Saks 5th Avenue I was taken aback by the Louis Vuitton display, let’s just say it was out of this world lol.
It’s what I love most about living in NYC, there is always something new to view! Pretty dope huh.
It’s hot and humid and looking like it’s going to rain any minute, so Cakes and I are spending the day under the a/c at home cooling out. What I love most about being a mom to a 4 year old is that a chill day at home always turns out to be anything but chill. (insert sarcasm). Since she loves to help me cook I thought instead of giving her a regular messy bowl of ice cream that’ll be dripping down her face, hands and arms let’s have a treat that’s fun to make, adds some fruit and won’t need a clean up team. Vanilla ice cream and strawberry hearts.
All you need is ice cream of your choice, fruit of your choice, a silicone ice tray, a bowl and a spoon:
1. Set 2 or 3 scoops of ice cream aside until it’s soft enough to mix.
2.Dice fruit (I used 4 small-medium strawberries).
3. Mix the fruit into the ice cream (if your mix gets a little soupy it’s totally fine).
look at those wittle hands go 🙂
4. Once the fruit and ice cream are mixed well, place in your silicone ice tray.
so nice and neat (baby ocd much?)
5.Place in the freezer for 30 minutes.
6. Pop some in a bowl and enjoy!
Bon Apetit friends!
A little over a week ago I was going through my camera roll on my phone and noticed that Cakes had taken pictures. Some pictures were of me, a couple of my butt when I was bending over to get something from the fridge, a few of Mr.Grumps, being grumpy and then there was one picture of some woman that I didn’t recognize right away. As I stared at the picture with my eyes narrowed trying to figure out who it was I realized, the woman was ME! I didn’t even recognize my own physical self. I had no idea that I looked like that. How long have I looked this way? Is that what people see when they see me? These were all the thoughts clouding my brain as I dramatically spiraled out of control. I’m talking full on dramatics here. Sliding off the couch onto the floor then crying in my hands as I sat criss cross apple sauce. I then realized that life was happening to me and I was too busy taking care of everything else to even notice.
I can’t quite tell you when my sneaker to shoe ratio got out of wack and just turned into my sneaker collection. As I do not know how my wardrobe has become overrun with “stretchy things” and not the body con dress type stretchy things. Or when my fun colored lippies turned into chapstick and go. Or how the bags I carried on my arms relocated to under my eyes. Who knows when all the gray hairs voted my brown hairs off the island and took residence front and center on my head. By the way the browns are straight punks they didn’t even put up a damn fight. Or when my bi-weekly wash and sets turned into f*ck it dirty bun liiiiiife, I have no idea when or how I gained all this weight, hell I don’t even know when’s the last time I took a good look in a mirror to even notice. It was like I got bitchslapped followed by a cup of ice cold water thrown in my face. I’M AWAKE!
In my head pops all these cliches and memes and inspirational quotes that I come across and mmmhmmm (like I be knowing when obviously I had no clue)
(yeah you’ve seen these too) the cup and the pouring one got to me the most.
I moped about it for
a couple days more like a week and then I just decided I have to just do it. As automatic and effortlessly as I take care of Cakes and home and work and everything else, is as automatic and effortless as it should be for me to take care of me. Hell nobody else is going to, that’s evident. Shit nobody even told me, wait maybe 2 different people giving me 2 different gift cards to 2 different spas was my cue that I totally missed. Oh my goodness did I really miss that? Welp, that just went clear over my head now didn’t it! It appears I really was asleep. I know this sounds easy enough and you’re probably reading this like I’m crazy but this is really hard. You get into a routine in life, it works and you kinda just go with flow. The thing is that seeing that picture was like a wake up call that hey it isn’t really working time to try something else. Now is the hard and uncomfortable part which is I literally have to demand from myself time for myself. I think I may have to try the Being Mary Jane method for awhile and write things on post its and put them around the house as a reminder to remember me until remembering me is a habit. Aren’t I just as important as the people and things that I think are important. Hell yeah! So now it’s time to act accordingly. How fitting is it that it’s a couple of days before my birthday and I get to put into practice and get to work so that my 30 somethingth year can be better to me than my 30 somethingth year.
Have you ever experienced a time when you lost sight of yourself? Or forgot to take care of yourself or put yourself on the shelf? And what did you do to get back?
I’m not even kidding when I tell you this is my first complete and total epic fail. Not because it wasn’t tasty or it looked a mess but because this recipe was so freaking annoying you have no idea. I’m so annoyed that I can’t even go through the steps with you I am completely done with this recipe. Seriously!
Okay so here is the tasty version of the recipe:
And here are the reasons why I hate (I’m aware that hate is a strong word and if I could find a stronger word to express the extent of dislike I feel for these damn lasagna poppers I’d insert it here gotdamnit).
- It took me close to 3 damn hours to make this mess.
- You basically have to freeze them after every single step which I’m sure ain’t nobody got time for.
- Between the meat, sauce, cheese mixture falling out of the lasagna noodles, the flour, egg wash, bread crumbs, egg wash, bread crumb again and the freezing process my kitchen and hands were messy as heck which offset my OCD and literally gave me a mild anxiety attack.
- I was looking forward to them tasting like bite sized version of my lasagna (which I make a mean pan of) but it just tasted like super breaded and fried noodles. Don’t get me wrong I enjoy a good fried noodle but not when I’m expecting yummy, tasty, gooey lasagna.
- Mr. Grumps agrees these damn things aren’t worth all the fuss it took to make them.
- And last but not least the reason why I hate this recipe is because after all the mess, trouble and time it took to make these things….Cakes loved them and has asked me to make them AT LEAST four times. Ugh!
On a scale of 1-5 I give this recipe a “don’t do it Miss Celie”. Here is what mine looked like, I warn don’t be fooled by presentation these things are the devil.
Work has been so crazy and an absolute shit show. If the company’s goal is to turn everyone’s hair gray, cause stress related health issues and piss everyone off they are on the road to excellence. But I’m sure I’m not alone in that feeling so I shall move along.
As I was leaving the building Friday evening and chucking up the deuces minus one I told myself that I wasn’t gonna do jack squat this weekend. I was going to go home, hide under the covers and sleep. The only time I allotted myself to be out of my bed was when I was going to be applying my face mask, because another great side effect of work is the pimple insurgence. Well friends it’s Sunday and like the rest of y’all I’m wondering where my weekend went and how come Saturday comes and goes yet Monday comes and stay. The closest I got to my goal of weekend nothingness was getting a nap in on Saturday. Why is it so hard to obtain me time? Mr. Grumps tried his damnedest to help me achieve said goals and aspirations of slackerdom but it just didn’t work out. He tried to tend to all of Cakes few needs and MANY MANY MANY wants but it just didn’t work out that way. Especially when she’s so polarizing with her requests. “Mommy mommy mommy” Daddy appears. “I want mommy” well mommy is taking a nap. Silence as if to say I’ll wait or even better when she crawls into my nap space and lays on me. Not next to me in a cuddly manner but on me as in head on my face blocking my ability to breathe or her big ass heavy head on my belly, forcing me to wake up. Bless his heart he tried.
I’m starting to believe that it’s just not possible to take me time while in the presence of a little one. They cannot let it be and they will do everything in their little powers to stop it from happening. I actually found myself getting jealous of and coveting her energy. How and why the hell do they have so much energy I thought as I literally watched her run from the back of the apartment to the front and “cannonball” head first into the couch. Repeatedly. No breaks. No gasps of air. She. Just. Kept. Going. And Going. And Going. Just how? HOW! (In my very best Kanye voice).
I used to wonder why some mothers spent their Mother’s Day somewhere without their kids or when I’d ask my sissy what she had planned for Mother’s Day and she would say she planned to be in her damn bed uninterrupted. Don’t you wanna spend the day with your kids? Afterall they are the reason you have this day. Right? Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! So gotdamn wrong I was. I not only know why but fully intend to join the club. I now know they take the day in an attempt to regain 364 days worth of sanity, 364 days worth of sleep, 364 days of normal energy so that the next day they can go back and do it all over again with the fond memory of that one day they didn’t have to do shit. And gotdamnit you can count me in!
Me time will be accomplished next weekend when I run away from home and will probably spend the day calling my baby to check on her because I miss her so very much. Don’t judge me!
Is it too early for a cocktail!?
We’re pretty much damn near in May yet the weather is like a box of chocolates, you never know what ya gonna get. This week was fairly chilly so we had to revert to semi warm weather clothing. I love this leggings and sweatshirt combo because it’s bright and keeps you warm for those in between days.
Top: Circo (Target)
Leggings: Le Gap